My co-writer, Michael Stephenson, and I have posted another song to our songwriting blog that we'd like to get feedback on. It's called "Don't Say It" and you can listen to it here:
http://writersofsong.wordpress.com/2009/11/14/dont-say-it/
We're looking for feedback mostly on lyrics and music/melody/arrangement. Comments on production value won't be too helpful, since this isn't a final demo track candidate yet.
Lyrics:
Chorus:
So don't say it, you know you can't take it back
So don't say it, you know you just can't take it back
So don't say it, you know you can't take it back
So don't say it
Every time we fight, it's always the same
You say the things you don't mean
You say all those mean things
All those silly and mean things
You put them out there
For me to reply to
Last night it happened again
I could see in slow motion
Your scattered emotions
Words were flying like arrows
That'd never return to the place
Where they should have remained
This deja vu makes me wonder why don't I just leave you alone
It's been running around my head for days and days
What you said
Chorus
It'll always be there, in the middle of us
Keeping our hearts a little cool to the touch
And gnawing at the back of your mind
What she said, remember what she said
Remember what she said, remember what she said
Remember what she said, remember what she said
Remember what she said, remember what she said
When you walk out and slam that door
I know I don't want to be here no more
It's been running around my head for days and days
What you said
This deja vu makes me wonder why don't I just leave you alone
And I long for the time back when we both were young
We knew how to shut up and say goodnight
Chorus
Hope you enjoy the song!
Thanks,
Mark
p.s. In addition to "Don't Say It," we have several other songs posted on our site
here, and you can cast your vote for your favorite song
here.